Would you rather own an airplane or a ship? Why?

 To Fly or To Sail?

I choose to Fly. Fly away with me. A song that rings true to me when I need to get away is, “I’m leaving on a jet plane, don’t know when I’ll be back again.” For as long as I can remember this song inspired me to fly away and see the world. So many new experiences and moments to dive into.

Of all the times I have sat in an airplane seat I think to myself, I should become a pilot, then I could fly wherever I want to go! Small secret that might prevent me from flying… as soon as the airplane makes its way down the tarmac at 10 miles per hour and I place my headphones on, turn on my audio book… and I fall asleep.  I for the life of me cannot keep my eyes open as the plane takes off. What a scary situation as a pilot that would be.

Imagine the world you could see if you could fly along with the speed at which you can get places is amazing. Clearly money would have to be no object. The first place I would want to see in Bali. I have wanted to go there as a special occasion, like a 20 year wedding anniversary, since the day I looked for a honeymoon spot. In due time, with saving money, I will get there with my hubby one day. A dream written  down is a goal in action.

Why would I not sail? Sounds like snail mail. Slow and steady, not to mention the sea-sickness that might ensue, yuck!! Stuck in a 10x10 room, rocking up and down, no horizon in sight, attempting to share a toilet for days on end, someone call the doctor, this situation is serious.

Oh but the romantic Titanic scene with fancy dinners and live shows are all on board to enjoy. The dream to travel slowly and take in the fancy ship at a leisurely pace while enjoying a holiday sounds enticing. As I have not experienced this adventure yet, I will have to report back once my lucky stars align and I find myself be romanticized on a cruise ship set for a king!

If not a cruise, how about a catamaran? This is something I could definitely enjoy. Lying on the netting suntanning on the Ocean blue water with schools of fish travelling below me. Crisp, cold beer quenching my thirst before snorkeling the surface of the calm waters. Or casually cruising down the cliff shoreline with the breeze blowing in my hair. Yup, this sounds relaxing.

To Fly or to Sail? Depends on the boat, I guess…

13 Years Married

 April 10 marks the day of 13 years of Marriage!

We made it another glorious trip around the sun. Mostly ups, not very many downs. So much joy shared with one human for many years. 

Choice. We choose each other each and every day, to be there for each other, and to encourage or support the other in whatever choices the other makes in their life. Our life consists of a silent knowing of what the other person may be up to and an understanding of what may be needed. The hashtag married life (#marriedlife) is quoted daily in our household, where life experiences are shared at every level on the human side of feeling and sensing.

No complaints here. Being able to live, love, and just be with another person is comforting.

Each year, without fail, we journey to the place where we were married and we re-read our wedding vows. Feelings of excitement wash over me every year as we walk down the path to the center stage of our ceremony. I love that we are able to go to the exact location and share the moments that began our relationship as husband and wife.

This year marked an unforgettable time together that my husband asked me not to share with the world! It consisted of laughing hysterically till we were both crying. Then attempting to re-read the vows cause neither of us could hold in a burst of laughter. Laughter from the pure joy and happiness to the marked occasion of being there again, together. Special. We are special to have each other and to go with the flow of the moment and not be hung up on the oddity of the glee.

When the laughter subsided and the sincerity came through the tears of love sprang through the lashes as we were reminded of the unconditional love and the promises, we made to each other and year after year the vows hold true. The words we wrote to each other hold merit within our arrangement.

For me, the biggest piece of advice I could pass on to anyone is that household tasks don't need to be done immediately. The garbage can wait 10 minutes, the tidiness of the house can wait three to seven days, the cleanliness of the rooms can wait, and the paint on the exterior can wait a year or two. A house that is lived in is a house that has a mess, but that house is full of love and time spent together enjoying the comforts the house has to offer. Love and rich memories are built in the moments of living the day-to-day.

The best recommendation is to keep it spicy. Find adventures to go on together. Go out late, dance, jump in puddles or the lake, play on the playground, sleep in too small of a bed together, travel, drink coffee, and always find joy in the being and doing together.

And Choice. Choose each other each and every day. Choose to make the other person smile. Choose to chase the one you married. Choose to share the moments on the couch, at the dinner table, in the yard, washing the dishes, or venturing the shopping aisles. Choose love in your response. Choose love in your words. And above all choose your spouse each and every day.

If you were invisible where would you go?

 If I was invisible I would want to be in the dressing room of an NHL hockey team or on the ice during practice to hear the conversations had with professional athletes. I refer to a hockey team as I have had the privilege of witnessing what head coach Kris Knoblauch of the Edmonton Oilers has brought forward in the 2023-2024 season. But really I would do this same exercise with any professional team sport.

What is gained from a coach before, during, and after a game holds so much value in the athletes minds. One person is able to sway the tempo of the game for the good or bad with words. Words hold so much merit, weight, or encouragement to bring a group together for a common goal.

The same holds true in working world. If you are leading a group of professionals to a workplace target you need buy-in to get the entirety to the finish line. A group of individuals not knowing where they are going are lost, showing up for work and going about their tasks not knowing the end result. But a group of individuals showing up to the team meeting sharply at 8am listening to the days objective and re-grouping near the end of the day to see the results will maximize their time punching the clock.

As a leader, the way you show up matters. Leaders are not allowed to show up at work wth their bags filled of home-life garbage. I get that you are an individual trying to make a buck but that is not what you get when you are leader. Everyone who looks up to you comes first. Your demeanour, attitude and behaviour is sensed by your colleagues the minute you walk through the door. 

The same holds true for coaching athletes. You need to show up prepared, ready to teach, and show them the way and the why. If you can master this you are well on your way to leading people. Be prepared to Lead the way as individuals are always looking to follow someone!

Fill Your Jar With Kindness

 "You really are amazing at making people smile with your genuine approach in getting to know them."

"Every time you sit down to complete a task and remove the distractions you crush what you set out to do."

"The ability to remain calm in high-stakes situations is admirable."

"Damn you look good in jeans and cowboy boots!"

Do you have a jar filled with positive statements about the specific things you are good at or positive affirmations to bring you up when you are feeling down?

Imagine what it would feel like to dig into this jar and pull out a few good statements when self-doubt begins to rear it's ugly head.

I can see the warmth spreading with a smile on your face now. It feels soooo good to be reminded of your goodness. You can be the one to give yourself positive affirmations! Brighten your own day! Make the difference you need in the moment.

You know that on a good day you are marvelous at many efforts in your immediate world. The struggle comes from the moments of weakness, that little voice in your head suggests it's too hard, or you're not good enough, or others are better than you. We need to stand tall in these moments, reach into our jar and pull out some specific positive statements about what we are good at and remember the awesomeness that lives in us.

You know it takes all our unique personalities to make the world go around in an interesting and fun filled way. Could you imagine being married to yourself, having yourself as your best-friend and all your co-workers having the same personality as you. It doesn't work. We need chatty Kathy, Positive Paula, and Realistic Ralph.

So pull your head from your ass, grab some personal kindness to yourself and get on with your business!

Taxes

 phew 😓

Taxes complete. Another day another dollar.

Taxes can be straightforward when you have one T4 income or a couple but when you start adding investments, self-employed income, or any other complexity it adds to the burden of reporting.

This past year my husband started delivering bundles one day per week to earn some extra cash, but the income was considered self-employed, with no T4 to be issued. So, to make this work logically I started putting some cash in his RRSPs to offset this earning. 

On another note, I started running courses for BC Soccer and they issued me a T4. But during input into the tax program, it advised that wages reported on a T4A in Box 38 need to be reported as self-employed income as well.

Here I was, left to declare that both my husband and I were now sole proprietor business owners!

What comes with this task?

Receipts, Receipts, Receipts!

What did I not have?

Receipts, Receipts, Receipts....

Ok, so we faked the receipts. Logically I might add. We tracked kilometers that his route took and logically calculated how much gas that would be, along with insurance pro-rated to usage.

As for me, I gathered a few minutes of travel and a couple of meals and that was the end to that.

Now, what is the probability that we are getting audited? Cross my fingers and pray to the audit man upstairs that we are in the green.

Needless to say, taxes can be stressful. The thought of owing money to the government to earn money makes me sick to my stomach. I would rather put the money in RRSPs, go to school (pay tuition), make a bad investment, or find another way to save my way out of owing.

Hopefully, you have all filed your taxes for 2023 and you can now get on with a prosperous 2024!

Confidence

 You have it or you don't.

Really?

Or you can gain confidence with practice and experience?

My take on confidence in my immediate world right now is to have the belief in myself that I can do the task at hand. The extension I offer to the people around me is that I believe in them to get the job done to the best of their ability and they need to believe in themselves enough to complete the job as well.

It's funny how confidence or lack thereof never goes away. Professional athletes experience this problem, children playing grassroots sports come across a lack of confidence, the Grade 3 student at the local elementary school doesn't believe in themselves, and the adult going into the meeting around the corner is not feeling it. Why? Why does the inability to believe in your ability fall short of the mark?

As we are wired, we remember the cutting remarks someone once told us and for some reason, it always holds merit in our minds. Or we recall the way we were treated and feel that our shortcomings will bring out the mal-treatment from another in the same way.

As the saying goes, life's not fair. 

It's fair to note that our primitive brains take over as well. From hunter/gather days we were bread to fight for our lives, like there is always an attack against us. So, when we are in the middle of something we experience in our everyday lives or a high stakes, gotta win-it-all kind of moment our brain automatically runs through worst-case scenarios, leaving us with a low belief in get-er-done.

Your brain's natural response does not need to be center-stage in your life. A simple series of positive affirmations can set you on the right track to exude confidence and complete the task.

This past December I decided to take control of the pattern playing on repeat whispering between my ears and make a goal with myself to have 365 days of positivity. To be clear, I am not a negative person on the outside, the message was to clean the thoughts up going on inside my head. And to really send this goal home, I asked a peer at work to hold me accountable. 

WOW! What a difference the past few months have been.  I show up to work in a positive mindset which has allowed me to show up in my personal life with the same positive outgoingness. Naturally one spilled into the other. I highly recommend this.

This is one example of creating a new outlook to build confidence up and be there for yourself. Once you can be there for yourself, and believe in yourself, your confidence will increase in other aspects of your daily outings.

In short, you need to tell yourself an amazing story; sell yourself to yourself. What would your greatest cheerleader say to you at this moment? In this moment you are amazing, capable, strong, determined, and disciplined, now go and get it done the way you know how, the way you were meant to do it!